By WAYNE HALL "My name is John Amsterdam, and I'm an alcoholic."
"Hello, John."
I'm all for socially relevant stories (I'm a Star Trek fan, after all), but the Alcoholics Anonymous theme in "Keep The Change" left me cold.
Here's what happened this week: A homeless man's best friend on the street dies of an apparent overdose, but he's sure it was a homicide. Of course, the police don't buy it, but John does, and sees in the homeless man something of himself about 40 years ago -- an alcoholic in need of help.
John flashes back to the 60s when he apparently was a stage performer. (Really, what hasn't John done in the past?)
A friend named Frank helps John enter the AA program by giving him a special coin and saying, "Keep the change."
As part of his recovery, John must write down every secret he's ever had and tell them to someone. That person was obviously going to be Frank.
However, a heart attack takes Frank out of the picture, so John chooses to tell his 20-something son Omar, who plays in John's band. Omar seems to feel closer to his dad after the revelations.
There are a lot more suspects in this week's murder mystery, including a city councilman and his do-gooder wife, who has set up a "Big Apple" clinic.
Along the way, we meet a rock star drug addict in the AA meetings (who before too long is another apparent drug overdose suicide in his hotel room -- a la Heath Ledger?) and a few other possible suspects.
We discover that there were actually three people involved.
The do-gooder wife was "doing good" by the rock star in private. When the rock star witnessed the do-gooder wife run down a child with her van, guilt moved him to tell someone, so he reached out to the homeless man whose apparent overdose started this whole episode.
When its discovered that the homeless man knows the secret, he's taken out of the picture by the city councilman who wants to keep his wife's dalliances away from the limelight.
In the romantic plot thread, all's well with John and his "true love" as they knock their knees on the walls of John's place until ... the doctor realizes that John is holding back in the information department. When she confronts him about it, he hesitates to say something (which she doesn't like), and she starts to leave. John then blurts out the truth about his immortality, as he always does, but she doesn't believe it (just like no one else believes it when he says it) and walks away.
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